The Benefits of BABYWEARING

When we are welcomed to parenthood, we are also welcomed to a whole new world of phrases and terms to do with child raising, it’s almost like learning a new language, right? A term which has become increasingly popular and continues to do so amongst this generation is BABYWEARING. Although it is fairly obvious what this term means (wearing our babies) what is not immediately obvious are the scientific facts, the studies and the wonderful benefits of this practise during the early years of raising our little loved ones.

When it comes to babywearing so many questions arise; which carrier should I use? What’s the best make? What does the term ‘ergonomic’ even mean? When can I start wearing my baby? Is it safe? When should I babywear? Whilst ALL of these questions won’t be answered in this specific post, one question which I will be answering is;

WHAT ARE THE BENEFITS OF BABYWEARING? 

  • OXYTOCIN LEVELS: When a mother gives birth, many people don’t realise the importance of keeping the newborn as close to the mother as possible and at nearly all times for at least a minimium of 6 weeks post-partum. Why? Is this the first time you’re hearing this? Most probably. So here’s the theory, a female body for 9 months forms and carries a child around, it creates this baby and all of a sudden after 9 months gives birth and many societies or cultures expect the mother and baby to stay away from each other in some form or the other from very early days, it is expected of many societies and cultures that the mother let varying guests hold the baby e.g. friends and families. Whilst of course we must accomodate to the fact that we are a civilised species and that we cannot hoard our babies and not let anyone touch them we must also for a second stop and think, what should our reactions be as mammals? We are mammals and we still sport many mammal instincts and characteristics in today’s day and time (of course). Not many realise that this constant distancing from the baby decreases our oxytocin levels. Why is that a problem and how does babywearing help? Lowered oxytocin levels means a ‘lowered level of happiness’. Thus increasing depression, which manifests into post-partum depression and in extreme cases post-partum psychosis, as well as pschosomatic illnesses in mothers. This is nothing new, think about all other mammal species, they do not let ANYONE or ANYTHING even touch their babies for the first 6-8 weeks. Babywearing helps increasing this scenario as oxytocin levels are increased through physical contact with the newborn. Thus having a postive domino effect on the relationship between mother and infant. Stronger maternal bond -> better understanding of baby and it’s needs as well as easier breastfeeding -> better care. 
  • NEEDS ARE MET: Babies who are carried are generally calmer because all of their primal/survival needs are met (we are still mammals at the end of the day). The caregiver can be seen, heard, smelled, touched, tasted, felt, giving especially newborns the closest feeling to being in utero as possible. This makes the transition from in utero to out in the open world a much smoother, easier and less traumatising one for newborns. As well as this, the caregiver is able to provide feeding and the motion necessary for continuing development e.g. neural, gastrointestinal and respiratory health (hopefully the caregiver NOT being a smoker) and to establish balance (inner ear development).
  • HUMANIZATION’: Infants are ‘humanized’ earlier. Instead of spending their first days in anxiety, trying to figure out the giant world around the, and wondering/crying for their parents (generally specifically the mother). Infants feel safe, secure and content thus allowing them to develop socially and concentrate their energy and rapidly growing brain on other things such as studying facial expressions, studying body language and energies as well as learing languages.
  • ESTABLISHING INDEPENDENCE: One thing that many people DO NOT realise is that babies who are baby worn actually are more prone to establish their own independence then those who are not. Why? Because babies who are babyworn spend the lives in a secure state, rather than in a state of panic or anxiety due to separation (separation anxiety), This constant state of being content and secure manifests into a child with confidence in themselves rather than a child that is fearful, therefore the domino effect being that a child with confidence feels ready to establish his/her own independence from an earlier age and explore the world around them – continuing to grow and become an independant adult.
  • ATTACHMENT AND LOVE: This one a more obvious benefit of babywearing, carrying your baby around almost always ensures a growth of a strong bond inbetween the caregiver and baby. Being that close, and feeling the someone so dear to you, so close to you all the time can only result in a feeling of closeness, physically, emotionally, mentally and full of love.

These are the main benefits of baby wearing, covering some of the maybe not so obvious reasons as well as physiological reasons on why babywearing is such a healthy practise when it comes to raising our children. Although I covered these few points, yet in detail, there are many other reasons as to why we babywear and how we use babywearing to help us in every day life. Please don’t forget to subscribe to my youtube (Life of a Chocolate Girl ) to learn everything you need to about babywearing and lots more!

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Road Trippin’ gone (w)RONG

So last weekend, we thought it would be an awesome idea to take the kiddies on a road trip to BRASOV – another county, around 5 hours from our home county. We planned on leaving Saturday morning, staying the night, visiting all the way through Sunday and then making our way home Sunday evening. It would have been great if all had went well, it was even funnier, that things went totally wrong. Here’s the thing, for some reason me and my husband are able to have full blown panic attacks over a dirty house (we like it nice and clean, no idea why we’re SO OBSESSED), however, when we are stranded and have nowhere to stay we’re simply just the type to casually laugh it off and find another way. This time the other way meant returning home at 4am with two babies. More about that later, let me just take you quickly through our day, my first impression of Brasov, a few pics we took and then the funny part at the end!

So we left earlyish on the Saturday morning, grabbed some breakfast and snacks and we were on our way! The babies were angels and slept the whole way in the car, (Lucky us right?!) after around a 4-5 hour drive we arrived in Brasov, my first impressions of this county was sincerely, how CLEAN and fresh the air seemed, historical, beautiful and something which probably others wouldn’t notice but I do is how the houses are all the same. It is so organised, orderly and picture-esque, I’d love to buy an apartment there! So we went to visit the Dinosaur park in Rasnov which of course was awesome for Ayan, he loooved it, and then after we climbed up to the old medieval castle where we were lucky enough to find and capture the most amazing sunset, with a view as far as your eyes can see and as high as the mountains can go! After a long tiring day we wanted to go to our avantgarde apartment which we had booked except it seems that it had all gone disastrously wrong, the booking site never got back to us in time, they couldn’t find us another place to stay so we found that we had NOWHERE to stay, believe it or not ALL the hotels in the area were booked for the night, so what did we do instead? Did we stress? Did we argue? NOPE. We went to the nearest supermarket (carrefour) bought some bottles of water, WASHED OUR BABIES IN THE CAR PARK (still 30+ degrees outside) went in search of pizza, put the babies to bed in their carseats and then my husband drove us home. It actually felt sooo cozy (I love night drives in the car), with music softly playing in the background, the hum of the cars engine.

ps. update on the situation, the booking site fully refunded our amount AND gave us $200 towards our next booking. So we made the most of the situation and got our money back plus more. Positivity = win/win

Below I’m posting some pictures from our trip, also if you want to watch my VLOG from this trip don’t forget to check my youtube @lifeofachocolategirl to see my road trippin’ vid. And I’ll see you next time on the blog!!

 

Baby jetsetters 

So, we made it! As the time ticked by Thursday night and Ayan just couldn’t/wouldn’t sleep, I began to feel as though the whole trip would end up in a serious meltdown situation. However, although running on 0 sleep we managed to backpack, our belongings, front pack our kids, not forget anything and get to England all in one piece. Thank God for that. 

I’m not exactly sure how much time I will have to blog whilst exactly on the trip, two babies, catch up with the family, outings, shopping, legalities. I have on the other hand been documenting with videos + pics to fill you in on my days over here and of course one of the most important celebrations – my BIRTHDAY

For now, here are some snaps of Aryana on her first flight and Ayan of course. 

International Women’s / Mothers Day & a bittersweet moment for a mama. 

If you’re a mother then you already know that having children is the most bittersweet experience which you will ever have the pleasure of embracing in your life. By this, I mean every single step of the way from the very day our dear children are born we find ourselves constantly looking forward to the next step, the next milestone, the next new thing they will do tomorrow. Yet at the same time, every time we reach that unspoken tomorrow we find ourselves wondering when did time pass by so quickly? When did our little baby grow so big? We find ourselves almost wishing we could have the ‘before’ days, just for a few moments more. 

Sometimes specific moments or milestones can be a shock factor, for me as a mother, last week was one of these moments…my little baby (or better said toddler) started nursery this month. On his first day there, I found myself wondering when did the past 14 months fly by? I still see him as the little 3.45kg newborn as I hold him in my arms everyday, I normally find myself wishing these sleepless nights will end soon, that soon I’ll have time for myself, but I found his first day of nursery changed all this. I found myself wanting to cherish every moment with my little love, the diapers, the sleepless nights, the breastfeeding…because one day he’ll grow up, spread his wings and fly out of our little nest in which we’ve raised him in. One day I won’t hear his cries or his laughter filling the empty spaces of my house, soon he’ll grow and won’t leave toys lying around for me to trip over and nearly break a bone every time. Soon he’ll grow into a beautiful child that won’t demand to be breastfed whilst I’m trying to do something important, he’ll be too big and tall for me to carry around the supermarket whilst trying simultaneously to push the massive trolley of shopping around at the same time, even if I would wish to do so. So without pushing boundaries into ‘spoiling’ your child, take 5 mins from the housework to simply hold, smell and kiss your baby as you breastfeed him in the last few months, carry her around the supermarket for a few minutes when she wants to be in your arms, cuddle him in your bed and fall asleep with him curled up into your arms, just one day all of this won’t be possible. You won’t be able to hold your 30 year old son or daughter in your lap and have them sleep on you, however ridiculous it sounds, it almost sounds just as ridiculous to not do these things whilst they’re so tiny and small! So don’t let all these other mothers who swear that they do everything so ‘correctly’ have an impact on the upbringing which you give your child, we can rest assured that even these ‘perfect’ mothers have their own guilty pleasures too! And by the way, who invented the ‘correct’ way of motherhood anyways? Correct to me, is doing what is correct for my child – and that is doing what makes us all happy within boundaries so that our days can pass by in harmony…

I’ve learnt to cherish all these moments and every second of them, because one day we will grow old, and we will have so much time to ourselves we won’t know what to do with it. In those days we will find ourselves  wishing back those baby days, so let’s live, love, laugh, cry and curse (in our heads), cherish every great moment as well as every hard moment that comes with being a mother. As in the end when we look retrospectively, it’s been an awesome journey through motherhood, that will never end,  but it is oh so worth it! 

To end it, here is my little baby, and wish to all of you for a happy International Women’s Day/Mothers Day to all you beautiful mothers around the globe! 

Can we freeze our babies in time? 

The hardest thing about being a parent is not the poopy diapers, the sleepless nights, the early mornings, the change in family functionalities, it’s not even the emotional roller coaster that comes with being a parent. No, no. The hardest thing about being a parent is growing and developing with our child, learning to accept certain changes, and being stuck in this ‘realm of want’ between the future and the past. 

What I mean exactly is that we find ourselves looking at pictures of our babies in the past and wishing they were that tiny again, then the next minute we find ourselves thinking about how much we can’t wait till our beautiful little bundle of joy can sit or stand or do the next coolest thing. For many of us, that’s the hardest about being a parent, to accept these changes that happen every second of every minute of every day. It sometimes makes you feel that since having a baby everything is one big blur. Almost like a fast forwarding recording. 

Wishing our baby was that teeny newborn again, then waiting in anticipation for him to be able to sit up by himself. Does that make us as parents ungrateful? Of course not. Do you sometimes feel that you are ungrateful for having these feelings? Me too. The point here is accepting the constant change of that teeny person who we love the most in the entire universe. 

Of course we are absolutely greatful and 100% satisfied with our healthy little bundles of joy that grow with laughter, tears and in weight and height every single day! This post steers far away from that. However, those who read this and can empathize and identify, I’ve written this post to say I feel you! I found myself in the strange ‘realm between past and future’ today whilst holding my little baby in my arms. Everyday I find (no matter at what age he is, that I just wish I could freeze him and keep him as he is.) Then it hit me what a strange concept this was. Common yet strange… Like most of the feelings involved when you are a parent. 

On that note I dedicate this post to my beautiful little baby boy who is 4 and a half months old. He’s a very healthy, beautiful, strong smart little boy and I love him with all my heart! 

I’d love to see all your cute little bundles of joy! So please feel free to comment pictures below. 

2 weeks old

3 weeks old
  
4 weeks old
  
5 weeks old
  
6 weeks old
  
8 weeks old
  
9 weeks old
       

   

13 weeks old
      
17weeks old
      
19 weeks 3 days