So I’m here again after what seems like an eternity, apologetic and ready to ‘catch-up’ as usual. Or more likely fill you in on all the crazy happening in my life. I would like to pretend I’m sipping a cup of coffee whilst my newborn is napping away and I’ve found an hour from my sweet new mommy #2 life to write this blog post. However, the truth is actually on my way to a check up with my doctor, sitting in the back of the car, making myself extremely nauseous whilst I write this. Anyone else get that? And truth is I’m cranky because I’ve said to myself a thousand times I should write on my blog, but by the time night comes I’m crashed out in bed with my make-up on whilst putting Ayan to sleep. Motherhood. So therefore I can’t wait any longer so I’ll just write in the car and throughout the rest of the day whenever I’m catching 5 minutes to do so. That’s paragraph one done. I’ve arrived, so I’ll save this draft and be back later…
Back again, finally home, everything is great! Scar is looking good. Aryana is currently burping/vomiting on me whilst I write this, however, before I leave in half an hour to take her for her first check up I would like to finish this post. So let’s see shall we.
As I was saying, well actually I don’t remember what I was saying, but what I do want to say is that, blogging is something I so love to do, I love to write, write about my life. I love the questions I receive, the insight I give people into my personal life. However, at some point blogging turned into a ‘competition’ for me, I kept following other bloggers, especially ‘mom bloggers’ to catch what ideas they had, to see how they were doing climbing the social ladder. And at some point I noticed a trend. These mothers all seem to have the ‘perfect lives’ with perfect babies that sleep through the night, perfect make-up, perfect hair and perfect white backgrounds for their Insta pics and their vlogs. And whilst all that may be true, it is not achievable – not without a whole lot of stress anyways. I found that at some point I got caught up in some kind of competition, to portray the ‘perfect Insta life too’. Stressing on taking the perfect Instagram picture, stressing on having my make up perfect for a vlog, stressing on writing the perfect blog posts. Making everything seem like my motherhood was easy, smooth and life was bliss. Well it’s not true. My life is bliss, but for all that it is and all that it isn’t. For all that I manage to do and all that I don’t.
If you’re a mother to be, or just another momma following a mommy blogger than please don’t put the expectations on yourself that they seem to lay out for you. I can assure you half these ‘perfect mommies’ have parents, in laws, nannies, cleaners to help them do what they do. Hence the extra time to do all these crafty, Pinterest things that get us feeling like we aren’t doing enough. Admittedly as a mother I have extremely high expectations of myself 99% of the time so I end up joining the Pinterest mommy club, however, it’s not always smooth sailing and there is 1% of the time when I’m a binge eating, tired, stressy mom who feeds my kids chicken nuggets for lunch AND dinner. And I’m going to blog about it.
Yep that’s right, I want to give a real insight into my REAL life. Not my wannabe Insta mom life that anyways I never can keep up with. I want to show what it’s REALLY like to be a momma with a toddler and a newborn, to be young, full of passions, tired as hell, mostly achieving what I set out to do but everyday for at least a few moments as my husband will tell you… a hot mess. I want to blog the real me. Blog what’s REALLY written in my diary for the day, write about the tantrum Ayan had and although I was a zen mother on the outside I’m crying on the inside. So as of today I’m blogging my life to you, my real life, with all the social media around even being a mother has become a competition and I’m tired of it, so join me on my journey, even if I don’t have fancy Insta pics or if I don’t look like a model everyday or if I write a cranky post, grab a coffee (only one if you’re breastfeeding or pregnant). Because motherhood is fun, it is great, it’s full of ups, but there is also sad times, frustrating times and times of tears. Because this is REAL motherhood, this is… motherhood unplugged.